The (Queer) Elephant in the Room

Let’s talk about the elephant in the room of online business and personal development. 

Spoiler: it’s us. The queer community. 

As I’ve moved through this world online for the last few years, one thing has become painfully obvious – the majority of it is designed for heteronormative and cisgender people. Programs and resources all worded to mention your girlfriend/wife/boyfriend/husband and other very gendered, het language. And then when you get into the programs marketed specifically for “men” or “women” it gets even stronger. It tends to leave someone like me, like us, feeling out-of-sorts and left out. 

Now, to be fair – I have seen and have been directly working with several coaches who are actively trying to become more inclusive, trying to use the words partner and spouse instead of the super gendered language, working to include LGBT co-facilitators and input and students. There are many who are very welcoming, will not discriminate, and are open to learning from us! I am grateful for the allies I have met and worked with and their willingness to learn.

However, the bottom line is they are still coming from a cis-het worldview, and years viewing things mainly from that lens. A google search for queer or lgbt coaches gives VERY limited results. There are a couple, with limited subject expertise. And even within that subset, I found some that were very specific to gay men rather than the whole community. For example, I was following one gay financial advice account and finally unfollowed after one too many posts about how to party and brunch for less money. Okay, that fits a specific subset of the community, which is great, but again, leaves a lot of people on the outside. 

This is where Blowing Up the Box comes in – one more way in which the boxes that have been provided to us don’t fit. So I’m building my own program that’s designed for inclusivity, built by someone who is IN the queer community, and actively utilizing input from others in segments different from my own. 

Larger than my own program, my goal is to influence more coaches out there to be more inclusive as well, to remember that there’s a whole portion of the population that is hungry for help and resources and doesn’t have as many places to turn for that. And I hope to inspire others in our community to get out and share their expertise as well. 

I love my community. We deserve the chance, the resources, and the support to become the best versions of ourselves.

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